Hi Maha, thanks a lot for your post.
You guys are really helpful for me because you enable me to see that what might be meant by what is written/said is much less important than the wondering which goes on. (probably a blog post brewing there)
It has taken me a while to cotton on to how I am writing so easily but my memory is coming back little by little.
When you write
“Simon’s posts (and God help me he is publishing multiple times a day, so this is gonna take a lifetime of thinking) last so long in my mind as I reanalyze them and try to figure out what he means, then give up and try to reflect on how I want to interpret them”
This is actually part of the process which goes on after I write a blog post, or post a quote, or an image or comment on a blog, I am continually readjusting my perspectives thanks to what I see appear in the connections. I throw out my own learning environment like throwing out contents of lego boxes, playmobil boxes and the cats which wander around.
When I am writing I may have an outline of pictures, scenes with predefined connections about what concerns me, but I don’t concern myself with thinking about what any message may be. I
t is a process like improvisation on stage – which is an art-form which I miss.
You are taken over in the instant by something/somebody/a place which comes out. It is like being engrossed in play – in the play that I remember as a child. I am part of the scene, I may take on perspectives, characters, I can hear, smell, feel the lion in the zoo.
That is what I love about the process of writing, it is one of discovery or creation of living fiction.
I think that I am able to do this – and this is also how I teach – because of gaining confidence through psychoanalysis – again there was no prejudgement or even a particular idea about what would come out of the silence. It was at times totally wierd and at times quite shocking.
As I was saying to a friend of mine the other day, it really is effortless, it doesn’t require any preparation any more than my daughter of five who is inventing her stories with her Playmobil characters.
I think that that is also what I am talking about when I refer to ‘into the wild’ or ‘grand narrative’ it is the narrative of a child who is unrestricted by norms and forms of what is considered good and bad.
So if you ask me what the posts mean, I would say they mean play.
If you were to ask me what I think about what is written – well that is the other process which goes on after they are written.
That however encompasses how the stuff is situated/connected to by others.
I think that is probably also how children make sense of the world they throw out words/pictures/behaviour and then they see how others respond.
So all that to say I am really happy that others like yourself can enjoy sharing my imaginary worlds with me.
I suppose that is the most marvellous thing that I or any other child or adult of any age can hope for.
Thank you very much.